Another chiru momiji Haiku

 Another Chiru Momiji Haiku 

by SHIKO Kagami

#haiku #shiko #chirumomiji #translation 

Urayamashii

utsukushuu natte

chiru momiji 

Enviable note - mashii  its the adjective not the verb urayamu 

beauty beautiful this form equals modern utsukushii 

natte is becomes apparently there are texts that record this line as ending with narite instead

the general idea though is beauty changing 

chiru momiji is the scattering and falling of autumn leaves maples or others

Enviable the beautiful becoming falling leaves 

This sort of haiku shows why haiku translations and waka too always need notes on the original and at least the romaji of the original !

Basho's ume ga ka ni ...

#Basho #haiku #ume

One of Basho's final haiku is the opening poem in a short renga done with his student Shida Yaba


Ume ga ka ni 

Noto hi no deru 

Yamaji kana 

I translate this as The fragrance of plum blossom Suddenly the sun rising On a Mountain path

Word for word in Japanese its plum fragrance at on place time marker suddenly sun of the rising (on) a mountain path.

Seems almost too simple

Ume can grow at quite high altitudes and think about the sequence of images

the fragrance of plums not the sight of pale flowers then suddenly the sun rising on a mountain path

the path winding up slope  through or past plum trees in the pre dawn gloaming barely visible invisible maybe and then the sunlight reaches the path ...

This haiku will be one of the themes for works shared on Patreon and DeviantArt  and other social media this month

Haiga coming soon!

... oh some thing else special about this month it can be written and read entirely with kana.

LIU ZONG YUAN the OLD fisherman

#lizongyuan #chinese poetry #oldfisherman

The painting I showed you in the last post was an illustration probably of this famous poem.

Beware there is another famous poem with only four lines about a fisherman by this writer who was also noted for his prose essays.

Here are my notes and VERY ROUGH translation VERY ROUGH

I'm hoping for feedback so I can finish it.

THE OLD FISHERMAN

yu weng ye bang xi yan su
fishing elder night side west cliff spends night

West Cliff may be a place name not just a description
Whether the fishing elder was Liu Zong Yuan himslef or a different person I leave you to decide!

xiao ji qing xiang ran chu zhu

first light draws water clear Xiang lights fire CHU bamboo
Most translations just say river and don't mention its the Xiang River
Chu bamboo was he cooking with dry bamboo using a bamboo steamer or what ?
Chu is the name of an independent realm predating the unification covering the area Liu Zong Yuan was travelling thru so is CHU bamboo actually a cooking style or what?

Note the U final rhyme scheme
(then) yan xiao then into the mists disappears (as) sun rises not see man

ai nai yi sheng shan shui cui

alas regret literary form of verb to be or an adverb ? one sound landscape green
there is no mention in the original text of an oar so what is the sound ?

turn see sky edge down stream mid current

cliff above not have heart/mind cloud(s) each other one by one moving

so just as the river flows on so do the clouds above in the sky

Lets tidy that up

The old fisherman for the night moors beside West Cliff

At daybreak draws clear water from the Xiang cooks with Chu bamboo

Into the mists he disappears when the sun rises
or the mists disappear when the sun rises I no longer see the man ?

again who is making the one sound ? the poet or the fisherman ?

sighing make one sound at the verdant landscape

turning I look at the skys edge down mid current

above the cliffs mindlessly the clouds follow each other

Comments invited

Birds at a Shrine

#shiki wrote a #haiku depicting #birds at a #shinto #shrine that can be read two ways

mi+yashiro ya
niwa hi ni tooki
ukine dori

depending on whether you read niwa and hi as one word or two
this reads

 prefix honorable shrine shinto

garden/yard/enclosed space light / fire being at distance tooki is a verb! toku !
floating - sleeping implied birds ukine = sleeping in a ship or floating object or uneasy sleep

Why are the birds sleeping in the shadows so far away from the light?

They should be safe on the grounds of a shrine?

I thought they were simply avoiding being disturbed and that Shiki was creating a word picture of birds barely visible but recently I found niwahi can also mean bonfire so there's a note of anxiety and sympathy ... the birds have perhaps moved as far as they can across a pond away from the noise of humans celebrating some kind of fire ritual?

Poor birds!

Qiu Noble

8 wine jars is a sign of respect?

ZUN Work Sheet

Trying to show links between character elements.